If you’re like me, you’ve been told your entire life, that once you have a baby your life is over. Blanket statements like that are complicated, layered with many mixed emotions, from many perspectives. Sometimes people intend it in good nature, coming from those who love and enjoy their children, but others, cannot let go of the past. People who still want to live their unrestricted freedom of adulthood, carousing and living the party life.
Life is full of changes. Of endings and new beginnings. Life is not something in which you should strive to stay the same. Without new experiences, we cannot grow. We cannot become all that we were intended to be. When you were a child, you acted as a child, thought as a child; but as an adult, you put aside childish things. Your life as you knew it, may be over, but your new life, has just begun.
Having a child does end your life, as you know it… but that doesn’t mean you should stop being who you are. Just because baby is here, you’ve not ceased being you. You should strive to become a better, newer version of you. Since my child arrived, I’ve had to reorganize how I live. I’ve had to make adjustments for my time on her schedule. Write and work on creative en devours at odd times of the day. But in all honesty, I feel as if I’m more efficient with that time, and treasure things I’ve taken for granted tenfold over what I did before. Time is that one precious thing that no matter how rich, or how busy you are, if you harness it properly, you can do anything. It is the one thing that everyone has the same quantity of (as far as we know).
When you have a baby you will instantly fall in love. People can tell you this over and over again, but you have no idea what in the hell they are talking about until you put your eyes on that child for the first time. When my daughter was born, I emotionally collapsed. Tears fell from my eyes like a summer rain. My heart almost burst. When I held her for the first time, it was even worse. She looked right into my eyes, straight at my soul, and left a mark on me. Though I was supportive of my wife throughout her pregnancy, until I saw my child, it seemed as if this was just something happening to my wife. After the big moment, however, everything changed. I knew then who my daughter was, and now, I would burn down the world for her if need be. Words cannot express how much I love her, and what she has done to me. What she is still doing to me.
More changes are to come, embrace them. Changes in my life have only begun. She is a little over two months old and so much has changed already. I’ve watched her go from sleeping all of the time, waking up to feed, and falling right back to sleep. To not wanting to sleep at all, and instead, wanting to stay up and play. She is starting to goo and gah. She loves to watch movie trailers with me on the computer (My guess would be the bright colors) and she’s starting to discover that she can effect things around her. Her perception of the world is ever expanding, each day is a wonder. In a way I feel as if I’m seeing the world all over again. I find it sad, that as we get older, things that were once mind blowing become mundane. But to her, everything is new, everything is amazing. Maybe that’s why she loves me, or maybe it’s because I’m her dad. Either way I’ll take it.
The truth is… everyone can tell you all they want about what it’s like to have a baby, but what they say are just words. It’s like explaining color to a dog or teaching a fish to fly like a bird. The concept is incomprehensible. However, if you do embark on this maddening journey, you will understand, and never want to let go, so long as you embrace it.
Maybe my life is over, but I’m so very glad it is.